I actually think Wynne is a pretty well-written character, since she manages to piss me off in all the right specific ways and gets me thinking about, like, my actual stances on feelings and religion and stuff, but OOH WEE IS SHE A PIECE OF SHIT. Kind of like Peggy Hill, right? Peggy sucks but she's an amazing character. Wynne is not really in Class Peggy but I feel compelled to log a list of her Crimes Against Thedas and also humanity.

• 1. Saying The Most Idiotic Shit About Leliana

At one point, Leliana shares her vision of coming to the Chantry after being all Joan of Arc and dreaming of the darkspawn. She makes a joke about sometimes getting the Chant wrong, but it's the thought that counts! Wynne counters with saying that what's important is the words of the Chant, and surely it must be critical to get every word right or you'd be spreading it "Wrong".

Leliana counters that she's sure that's not true, because she came to the Chantry after feeling the Maker in her heart and all that BEFORE she even KNEW what the Chant was - which honestly makes a lot of sense to me?! And Wynne, the heartless wretch, tells Leliana that "this" is exactly why the Chantry looks down on her and thinks she's a piece of shit (!!!!). Which is just a perfect encapsulation of the kind of people who rigorously follow religion as a ruleset and not, like, as a set of morals.

• 2. Being an Absolute Dick about The Warden and Alistair

Do you really think love makes people weaker, Wynne?!? I'm sorry you never experienced the joy of connecting with another human person (or elf or tal'vashoth or - you get the idea) at the circle but Morrigan is right, you're the fucking woooooorst. Do you REALLY think that caring for someone else makes you a worse person? Do you really think being united against the blight with the power of companionship is the worst, Wynne?!?!??!

I know she goes back on this one like "oh sorry you were right turns out the power of love IS valid and good uwu ha ha" but seriously, fuck you, dude.

• 3. Being The Absolute Fucking Meanest to Morrigan For No Reason

MAYBE THE REASON MORRIGAN REFUSES TO LET LOVE INTO HER HEART IS BECAUSE PEOPLE LIKE YOU THINK SHE'S INCAPABLE OF IT, WYNNE!!

What gets me also is Wynne says this to Morrigan's fucking face at one point?!?!? Maybe I'm biased because I love Morrigan so much and she's so much like me re: allowing love into her heart but FUCKIN' A, WYNNE, NO WONDER PEOPLE LIKE ME AND MORRIGAN ARE APPREHENSIVE ABOUT OPENING UP, jfc.

"Shut the fuck up, you heartless old witch." - The Warden, In His Head